Friday, March 10, 2017

Live Freeze

In a tireless journey to a picturesque place up town to make a living, I think I left the life behind. Here I stand with something in me but some element missing. I wanted to shed the past behind and leave a forever angry face at it. How I realize, maintaining the forever angry face at it is ruining my energy. Is this just the bald season just before the vibrant spring? Or is it a grave that is forever going to remain grey?

ACCEPTANCE! I accept it as my tragic past but why do tears flow all afresh! The years past could not deter the dedication to the fears past. The loyalty of trauma remains despite of efforts to drain it. Nature has its own way to bless and curse. It is often the best for you.
Amidst the anguish of shattering that I run from but did not master to cope with, I come face to face with a humble talented artist wearing the same costume of the Villon of the past that the artist is unaware of. The poor humble artist has only this costume and is here to perform an act of elegance. How can I turn my back to the artist who is right in my court? How can I disgust him for just wearing on a costume that is from my painful past that he is unaware of? How can I show him down on the only costume he has? Hence, I stand to cheer his performance. I freeze my feet to be very much at the show, as I push my mind to appreciate the talented artist. How do I silence the me in me to stay quite and calm?

I know the pain of the past is not worth my time and energy. The trauma shall not tame me for the worthless. How? How? and how do I live this present? Something that gives me a very sharp pain but can silence the unrest is “Forgiveness” as I cannot retaliate to the Villon, I just cannot accept but may be if I am willing to forgive the Villon of the past, I can have a better present. Somehow the me in me is silenced now but I do not even see it now. There is a whole lot of emptiness in me. There is no pain but tons of numbness riveting me tight. Should I stay easy for nothing now hurts? Should I crave for the living elements? Should I just let this solidify me? Should I ever dream of a spring?

Bruising myself constantly with trauma that cannot kill me. I am still in the battle of living in a beautiful life.

- Of the dairies of a trauma haunted victim. 

Wednesday, January 11, 2017

Life on a Safari

Well that is the living for women in India. I would not corner the case to India but just do not want to talk about other nations that I am not aware of.

The wild are free and the helpless are caged. This is how a safari is. Alas! Relatively innocent are asked to get home early or hold onto a shoulder while the beasts are free. Even if someone spots a drunk person misbehaving or a group of perverts, they just pass by them and do nothing. Instead of cornering the nonsense we advise the sensible to make a wise decision in avoiding those folks.
It is not a problem that a man is being wild. But it is a problem that a girl is returning late or venturing out to a New Year Party, or walking on a deserted street or in a mob (honestly it is no matter what). Why is this? Why are the women unsafe? Is it not because of those people who go wild? Should the wild be cornered or the …? Well when the wild are free, we are forced to be caged! That is life on a Safari.

Ruthlessly our society overlooks the people behaving wild because it is not yet that big of a crime! We also have a tolerance level equal to a registered crime! 

A potential victim sensing threat is looked on as nerd as nothing has happened yet. 
A potential criminal gets no glares. 

A victim already in pain is pacified with statements like "action would be decided and taken". 
A criminal is at leisure in a game that might punish. 

A victim suffers from the time the incident happens. 
A criminal is gifted more time for something unpleasant to start.   

A victim is thrown to unearned drastic situations.
A criminal is punished with well planned, tried and tested, well explained earned situations.

Situations would not improve until we learn to pluck the tender weed instead of axing it later when the damage is done and irreversible. Shame on everyone who is facilitating this Safari. Starts right from a mother who doesn’t question her kin on their where abouts to the police men who do not react to people getting wild. Indeed, for revenue, we facilitate wildness boasters like sanctioning more and more alcohol shops where not needed and expect the already crazy to be wise! 

Until then, all we can wish is, let the wild be blessed with disaster and trauma that leaves them just as shaken as an innocent victim. When all preaching fails, experience never fail to preach it loud and clear. Let the heavens shower some courage such that all of us have enough to stand up against the incorrect. Most of the times, victims live in a well of trauma. A world slow poison that has for ever made them blue! even they stand indifferent to situations as long as it does not involve them.  

Thursday, April 14, 2016

The sanction

A promise of the shores to the seas …..
The seas raise and cross over the shores.
Yet the shores are always with the sea.
A promise of earth to the volcanos ….
Volcanos roar, torch and burn.
Yet the earth bears and holds it.

A promise of love for life …..
I might love, get frustrated, play or feel low.
Your love has always been with me.

A promise of support ….
Ambitious, Arrogant, adamant, cranky, funny!
You have always accepted me as I am.

Unique craft piece that you are carving.
Pouring all your patience and dedication …
You make a difference in our lives.

Fierce, fair or false sometime we get a lot of support.

Friday, May 8, 2015

Away and Away

Trust is scalded in a massive destruction,
Sweetness in me drained into anxiety sweat then …
Innocence was cashed on.
Facts and efforts fail to tame destiny.

Determination dampened.
Drifting not to find something better but,
Just to wear on a coat of insulation.
Like the sunscreen that wears out on the face, so does it!

Something I sob for is the dead me.
Something that I learned to live without now is me.
Something that I cannot do anymore is smile honestly.
Something that I can do is may be help a few underprivileged a mechanical way.

May be the game is not over yet!

Battle forever

A battle with none but self.
This is the most strenuous one.
A battle the physically disabled also fight.
This is something nothing and no one can escape.

Victory and defect mean to the same to the world.
Within, you nurse each ….
As it is always you who wins.
But it is also always you who loose.

At times you start the fight for self.
By the time the celebration is in …
As you turn to shower the joy,
Oops! You can no longer access the one you were fighting for.

Probably you entered a new dimension of world.
Ah! You already lost the one you are fighting for.
The world might state you redefined yourself
Or you are starting a new life.

But it is a feast that not even that ghost would join.
This is what happens when you lose yourself.
Time, destiny and breath give you dimensions….

You continue painting a smile that keeps tainting.

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Define it

Directions can be limited.
Dimensions can have limitations.
Determination has known none.

Hug from Nature

After a long long long time,
I see a leaf drop its branch.
It rolls down in grace to fall flat.
Dancing after death was the leaf.
Graceful aging for the tree …..
Splendid blooming….
Sometimes it is an element of surprise.
Sometimes it is an element of delight.
Nothing is as soothing as nature.
A calm walk by it is the best soother.

A warm hug to the chilling winters!

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