Family! (Too loved and clutured to stand a threat)

I read an article in Times today about parental attitude that I just cannot disagree with. It may be a little against the therory I grew up in but maturity has drifted my thoughts to believe in the other hopefully better.

I perfectly agree that we are nothing without our parents and one needs to have respect for them. Parents is one relationship that we cannot replicate. You may getmarried, get divoreced and marry again and redefine the definition of a life partner and re live to the fullest. You may loose friends, make better ones and enjoy friendship. You may be close to one sibling and not to other but, one cannot replace mother and father. No matter what!

But does this mean that you feel indebt for a lifetime to your parents? No parents want to see their children in pain. Does this mean they draw the lines for us to dwell? What is the root cause of such emotional stress one experiences be it as a child or as a parent?

Every human who matures to an adult is definitely the grace of people elder to him. Everyone was once fragile toddler and kid who could be brokendown easily. Once grown, yes, he has his brain to think and make his way.

I believe one can guide kids till they mature to think and understand real world around the age of 20. After that probably one should have the liberty to fly high, low, in safe mode or a mode of choice. I can defenitely nurse a hurt bird but not dictate the lines for it to fly. Liberty shall not be a struggle or acheivable only while leading a life secluded overseas taking care not to cross the lines of visibility! In India, we lack this. We lack the geneiune sense towards society because of family bonding! Crippled feet cannot lay the path but only tread the path once laid.

Ashamed of myself, I write this post! I want to join the plight for a better living of women but I don’t. I mean I raise my voice when unheard in places that can make no difference to the struggle. I stand a  stumble for my friend who gathred courage to venture out and support by not venturing out. When her family questions her “when she being a girl of your age, is staying silent, why cannot you?” I feel a sharp sword tearing me to pieces as my friend looks softly at me. Here are the answers to the most common HUMILIATING, RIDICULOUS comments that a geneuin girl hears from caring family and the legal supervisors.

Why do you complain of eve teasing when that 100 girls don’t. May be something is wrong with your attitude.  Then they go on to stare at another girl and her to point out the differences!

My take: Stop starring first to point the differences. The fact is that they are staying dumb and I am speaking out the facts. They don’t speak up

 

Why did you not refrain from going when you see only men there?

My take: Huh!! Come on! Apply your statistical analysis and logical thinking together. In a nation where the gender ratio is pathetic and where most women are kept away from leading a competitive life, it is really few that venture out in the competitive world for the good. It is not uncommon to land in times where I am the only female among a male group. I cannot ask my girl buddies to accompany me always as I understand they need to get back alone too! BTW, girls are tied to responsibilities like, get home cook by the time … so need to take the first vehicle even if there are no women in it.

Why don’t you move at safe times!

My take: Crime happens in broad daylight amongst huge/ decent crowds too. They stay numb and advice not to make herself a fool. From my personal experience, it is easy for crime in crowd. I see a lot of crime that happens in crowd only.

Don’t complain. Just go on as if nothing has happened. If you make a scene people would talk about you….. more hooligans would target you.

My Take: Huh!! Will things ever change! Kills my ethics! I feel crippled. I can shed thousands of tears here and talk a lot about this and yell out the truth.

They are Drunk! Beware!

My Take: Who the hell asked them to? Don’t they know what happens when drunk? Cant they lock themselves and drink to their wish and not misbehave with others. Is it my problem?

Common excuse by Men that I Hate the most and the one that has swept lives off to the history, made mysteries and the best abused. “I WAS DRUNK AND DON’T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED”

My Take: Am I responsible. When you are one who enjoyed the drink and had fun, for doing nothing, why should I suffer? Irrespective of the damage of the drunken behaviour, is the sensibility of the male not in question? Knowing the harm it does, knowing the behavioural changes if brings, is he not a fool to get drunk? How can I know who gets drunk when and how can I avoid them. Why should the sensible be punished for his insesible act.

I wish every drunken person faces ill fate the very day he behaves drunk…. But not die in accident but meet with an accident that makes their living so difficult that everyone gets scared to drink beyond a limit. The probability of ill fate shall become equal to the probability of a common girl venturing out alone late in the evening facing eve teasing, only then shall the drunken not get so drunk and move around hazardeous to the common people. If they want to ruin their lives drinking without disturbing anyone sitting alone in a room, I don’t care. We have a lot of people better than them and not count on them.

Freedom to me is when “My Take:” becomes “What I do:”

Writing this post has not relieved my guilt but just made me feel exhausted enough to crash for the day with a sinking heart and raise to days where whipping my soul shall not ache as much as it does today.