hmmm...hmmm...hmmm

Rumble, fumble, stumble, giggles, mumbles

Hike, like, bike, strike, mike
Pear, near, dear, smear, bear
Strange, range, rage, age, sage
No matter what, life is just for the ultimate collapse.
A lapse in time that is making me run the laps on the maps is nothing but life!

My Philosophy!

Never say “NO”!

For I make sense most of the times.
Tell me what it takes to be there.
Tell me what it takes to make it.

Let me think if it is practical or a fiction.

If it takes vampire or a werewolf to be it, let me discard it.
Else, the friction in me may burn the fiction to materialize.
I respect myself.

Making of "T"Ears

Speak out! And you shall feel better!
It is a human tendency  to burst out and feel better.
Voicing out doesn’t solve, but is just a vent to the burn.

Wonder if there is a pain that you cant voice.

Wonder what if there is no ear to hear your voice.
Wonder what can help now!

“The EARS” that can help are Tears!

You can get somany as you want.
Somany that you want to tell to.

When there are no Ears you Trust.

Let Tears be The Ears you vent to.
It actually cools you down!

Tears are sometimes better

No risk of betrayal!
It is inbuilt skill since birth.

Though everyone knows to cry.
Noone who can entirely read your cry.
A blessing from the heavens for not so bads.

The gulit of staying silent over terrible acts …

Sometimes melt into tears
Later it cools me down and puts me to sleep!

Lanes lead by memories

A drive by heart as the brain is guided by the past
A drive with zero focus on destinations
A presentation projected by the memory.
A drive through fossils with not dimensions so well preserved.
A drive where the sole rejoices out of nothing.
 
A feeling unexplained.
An emotion undefined.
Drain by time that is still held in mind.
Cloud that rain a life time.
Experience science cannot define.
 
Fragrance out of nothing.
Light without a torch.
Darkness that candles can’t kill.
Uproars in the void.
Dangling down in the real world.
 
Mind you! All this can be experienced only if you can have the guts to let your mind fly as is. Do not try to dictate it

Family! (Too loved and clutured to stand a threat)

I read an article in Times today about parental attitude that I just cannot disagree with. It may be a little against the therory I grew up in but maturity has drifted my thoughts to believe in the other hopefully better.

I perfectly agree that we are nothing without our parents and one needs to have respect for them. Parents is one relationship that we cannot replicate. You may getmarried, get divoreced and marry again and redefine the definition of a life partner and re live to the fullest. You may loose friends, make better ones and enjoy friendship. You may be close to one sibling and not to other but, one cannot replace mother and father. No matter what!

But does this mean that you feel indebt for a lifetime to your parents? No parents want to see their children in pain. Does this mean they draw the lines for us to dwell? What is the root cause of such emotional stress one experiences be it as a child or as a parent?

Every human who matures to an adult is definitely the grace of people elder to him. Everyone was once fragile toddler and kid who could be brokendown easily. Once grown, yes, he has his brain to think and make his way.

I believe one can guide kids till they mature to think and understand real world around the age of 20. After that probably one should have the liberty to fly high, low, in safe mode or a mode of choice. I can defenitely nurse a hurt bird but not dictate the lines for it to fly. Liberty shall not be a struggle or acheivable only while leading a life secluded overseas taking care not to cross the lines of visibility! In India, we lack this. We lack the geneiune sense towards society because of family bonding! Crippled feet cannot lay the path but only tread the path once laid.

Ashamed of myself, I write this post! I want to join the plight for a better living of women but I don’t. I mean I raise my voice when unheard in places that can make no difference to the struggle. I stand a  stumble for my friend who gathred courage to venture out and support by not venturing out. When her family questions her “when she being a girl of your age, is staying silent, why cannot you?” I feel a sharp sword tearing me to pieces as my friend looks softly at me. Here are the answers to the most common HUMILIATING, RIDICULOUS comments that a geneuin girl hears from caring family and the legal supervisors.

Why do you complain of eve teasing when that 100 girls don’t. May be something is wrong with your attitude.  Then they go on to stare at another girl and her to point out the differences!

My take: Stop starring first to point the differences. The fact is that they are staying dumb and I am speaking out the facts. They don’t speak up

 

Why did you not refrain from going when you see only men there?

My take: Huh!! Come on! Apply your statistical analysis and logical thinking together. In a nation where the gender ratio is pathetic and where most women are kept away from leading a competitive life, it is really few that venture out in the competitive world for the good. It is not uncommon to land in times where I am the only female among a male group. I cannot ask my girl buddies to accompany me always as I understand they need to get back alone too! BTW, girls are tied to responsibilities like, get home cook by the time … so need to take the first vehicle even if there are no women in it.

Why don’t you move at safe times!

My take: Crime happens in broad daylight amongst huge/ decent crowds too. They stay numb and advice not to make herself a fool. From my personal experience, it is easy for crime in crowd. I see a lot of crime that happens in crowd only.

Don’t complain. Just go on as if nothing has happened. If you make a scene people would talk about you….. more hooligans would target you.

My Take: Huh!! Will things ever change! Kills my ethics! I feel crippled. I can shed thousands of tears here and talk a lot about this and yell out the truth.

They are Drunk! Beware!

My Take: Who the hell asked them to? Don’t they know what happens when drunk? Cant they lock themselves and drink to their wish and not misbehave with others. Is it my problem?

Common excuse by Men that I Hate the most and the one that has swept lives off to the history, made mysteries and the best abused. “I WAS DRUNK AND DON’T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED”

My Take: Am I responsible. When you are one who enjoyed the drink and had fun, for doing nothing, why should I suffer? Irrespective of the damage of the drunken behaviour, is the sensibility of the male not in question? Knowing the harm it does, knowing the behavioural changes if brings, is he not a fool to get drunk? How can I know who gets drunk when and how can I avoid them. Why should the sensible be punished for his insesible act.

I wish every drunken person faces ill fate the very day he behaves drunk…. But not die in accident but meet with an accident that makes their living so difficult that everyone gets scared to drink beyond a limit. The probability of ill fate shall become equal to the probability of a common girl venturing out alone late in the evening facing eve teasing, only then shall the drunken not get so drunk and move around hazardeous to the common people. If they want to ruin their lives drinking without disturbing anyone sitting alone in a room, I don’t care. We have a lot of people better than them and not count on them.

Freedom to me is when “My Take:” becomes “What I do:”

Writing this post has not relieved my guilt but just made me feel exhausted enough to crash for the day with a sinking heart and raise to days where whipping my soul shall not ache as much as it does today.

Essence lessons

In the mush rush for life, we are missing the essence of living. In rush to do nothing, I was driving home alone. The next meeting had quite a while when I bumped into traffic. It started drizzling. With rolled up windows and blank mind I was staring at the drops on my car glass. With the slow moving traffic, for the first time I was enjoying as I started talking to the teeny-weeny water drops. Each one was like needles dropping off the sky. The needles rush as if to hit but not to hurt, collapse soft on you as if kissing. Each of the drops on my glass was gleaming in the street light. Firstly each drop diverted me in its gleam. Soon my glass was full. It is all fun so far.

There were too many and I did not know which one to see. Few grew in size and as if rushing kick the others and grab attention, started rolling down the glass forming lines. No two lines were the same. The bigger drops preyed on the neighborhood drops and formed their own crooked ways and as this got too much blurring my visibility, I turned on the wipers!! Delight to distraction!

May be this is what happens with population.

Every person is interesting, nice and appreciated when they are few. As the crowd increases starts the race, greed and foul play. With different approaches and mindsets, people form groups of interest and end up ruining the whole beauty as is the case with today! I felt a pinch and drove down being blank.

Livid taciturn void

Why are there days like this?
The day the soul in me burns itself in grief.
It burns in the onus and in silence.
It preys on a body and yet complains.

When my body learns to stay numb and dumb,

Why does my soul not learn that art?
Unconvinced by my thoughts,
It hurls at me, curses me, cribs and punishes.

The worldly attachments that my brain barks about,

Detached and torched stays my soul.
Soul cannot sense the pain my body endures.
My body is a slave of my soul.

For a session of aroma therapy!

A session of spa!
Peaceful music!
Nothing can soothe my soul.

It wants me to be guilt-free

I could get in trouble if I do what my soul dictates.
Yet my soul can get its peace.
My soul is a parasite.

The unrest is simply increasing the more I walk away.

Miraculously, it harnesses energy when I walk with it.
After everything, it is relaxing on Goa beaches as my body heals.
Why are there days like this?

Soul married to honesty,

It roars at even the negligible things.
How did it learn to count those!!
Showers of blessings needed till this crazy soul finds its next prey.

Do you have days like this?